Saying “no” is very difficult especially when it involved close friends , loved ones, or family. We want to be there for everyone but sometimes that starts to take a toll on you when your body starts sending you messages to slow down. Even your mental health can begin to weaken, when you say yes to everyone but yourself.
There is always someone in your life asking you for help, or wanting you to be there for them whether physically or emotionally. These are all kind gestures that can sometimes results in us forgetting to take care of of ourselves especially if you are normally a giving and selfless person.
However, this is not saying to just bail on your loved ones and not be there for them. It’s all about balance and moderation. It’s all about equal exchanges of energy and setting limits that are healthy for both parties. We know the balance and limits is not always easy to accomplish. When other parties are involve it’s important to focus on what you can control.
Important Tips To Help You Understand When To Say No
Ask yourself these questions:
1. “Am I available right now? Sometimes we aren’t free and we drop everything and wrong. Be mentally available is also important. Stretching yourself too thin is one of the many reasons why people become stressed out.
2. Will these sudden changes effect other people ?” Saying yes to others at times can result in us leaving out other people or effecting other people that may be depending on you. Have you ever had to cancel other plans because you didn’t want to say no to sap some else? That’s when that change of reaction comes into effect.
3. Has this person been present for you lately? Sometimes we give, give, give on to others but no one reciprocates the same energy. Don’t end up empty just because you don’t want to disappoint. The person we fear to disappoint can be the actual person that is always easily saying no to us.
4. Am I doing this because I want to? or out of guilt? Sometimes when we do something without good faith bad things can happen whether it’s during the actual exchange or your body language will save something different when it’s time for you to show up. Don’t say no just to be petty or get even.
5. “Why am I saying no?” Knowing why you want to say no is a good question to always ask yourself. Know the true reason behind your hesitation.
To sum up, saying no can be difficult, but it’s important to say no when you feel it’s appropriate. During a time where our mental health is so important, it is crucial that we are also saying yes to ourselves more and more. We need to be in tune with our own emotions and mental health. This is why asking yourself these questions supports you in reflecting on what you are truly ready to pour on to others.